Don’t Argue Over Doubtful Things. (Romans 14: 1-13)

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📖 Episode Title:

Don’t Argue Over Doubtful Things
Romans 14:1–13

✏️ Episode Summary:

In today’s episode, we reflect on the Apostle Paul's plea for unity in the church—even when Christians disagree on non-essential matters.

Whether it’s food, Sabbath observance, or other grey areas of conscience and conviction, Paul’s message is clear: don’t pass judgment or treat each other with contempt. We explore the difference between the strong and weak in faith, the danger of legalism, and why unity does not require uniformity.

At the heart of it all is a call to live unto the Lord—because every believer belongs to Him, not to us.

🧭 Key Themes:

• Christian liberty vs. personal conscience
• Unity over uniformity
• Judging others vs. receiving them in love
• The Lordship of Christ over every believer
• Living with conviction—unto the Lord

📚 Scripture References:

Romans 14:1–13
 (With supporting insights from 1 Corinthians 8 and 1 Timothy 4)

📌 Quote to Remember:

“Who are you to judge another man’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand.”
 —Romans 14:4

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Chapters

• 15:50 [Ad] The One Shalom
• 16:38 (Cont.) Don’t Argue Over Doubtful Things. (Romans 14: 1-13)

Transcript

 "Don’t Argue Over Doubtful Things." (Romans 14: 1-13) When I grew rules around Sunday were important. Today for many these disputes might feel like relics of a bygone age. But the heart of these disputes is alive today, just in a less intense format. For example, in Northen Ireland in the 1960’s many Christians feel strongly that Sunday should be kept wholly sacred—my father who loved to read his daily newspaper wouldn’t by one on Sunday. Other families even more strict than mine said no TV, just church, rest, and reflection. Others believe it’s fine to attend worship and then enjoy leisure, football, or family time. The tension remains. So what would you do if you were there—witnessing two believers passionately disagreeing over food, drink, or how to spend Sundays? More importantly, what should we do when Christians differ over these kinds of "doubtful things"? The Bible has much to say. In fact, two major sections of the New Testament—Romans 14–15 and 1 Corinthians 8–10—are devoted to this very issue. Today we turn to Romans 14:1–13, where Paul lays out both the response we should have and the reason for it…. Our Response (Verses 1–3) Paul begins, Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarrelling over disputable matters. One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. (Rom 14:1-2)) The instruction is clear: welcome the one who is weak in faith. Don’t quarrel with them over secondary issues. This is a call to unity, not uniformity. The "weak" here likely refers to those who, because of background or conscience, still feel bound by certain religious restrictions (such as diet or Sabbath observance). Paul assumes the perspective of the "strong" brother—the one who understands Christian liberty. But he doesn’t tell the strong to pressure the others to change. He tells them to receive them. Verse 3 continues: The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. Whether you’re the strong or the weak, the message is the same: don’t judge others. Don’t look down on those with different ideas or ethics, and don’t condemn those with more freedom. God has already welcomed both. That’s the basic response when it comes to doubtful things—matters that are morally neutral or not directly addressed in Scripture. But of course, this raises all sorts of questions: Who exactly is the strong brother? Who is the weak brother? And what do we mean by a “doubtful thing”? Romans 14:2–3 helps answer these questions: “One person believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables. Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.” These verses make it clear who Paul identifies as the strong and weak brothers. Both have trusted in Jesus Christ; both are saved; both are part of the body of Christ. But there is a distinction in their understanding of Christian liberty. The strong brother believes what God has said about His Son, Jesus Christ—that He came in the flesh, died for sin, and rose again. But he also believes what God has said about the freedom we now have in Christ. For example, 1 Timothy 4:4 says: “For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving.” The distinctions between clean and unclean foods under the Old Covenant no longer apply. In plain terms: yes, you can eat bacon for breakfast and pork chops for dinner. The strong brother or sister believes that. But the weaker one says, “I eat only vegetables.” He is still a brother/sister. He believes everything the Bible says about Jesus Christ in regard to salvation. He believes Jesus is God in the flesh who died and rose from the dead. But they are unsure about certain freedoms—like eating meat. He has restricted himself to vegetables out of concern, perhaps out of conscience. Now it’s critical we understand who this weaker one is. So, let’s pause here and turn to 1 Corinthians 8. That passage gives a detailed picture. A Threefold Description of the Weaker Brother 1 Corinthians 8:7 says: “However, not everyone possesses this knowledge.” Paul is speaking about food offered to idols, and this gives us a clear description. The weaker one, first of all, lacks knowledge. They don’t yet fully understand the implications of freedom in Christ. That’s the first mark: a lack of theological understanding about Christian liberty. Secondly, 1 Corinthians 8:10 says: “For if someone sees you, with your knowledge, eating in an idol’s temple, won’t that person be emboldened to eat what is sacrificed to idols?” Because he lacks knowledge, he also has a sensitive conscience. His conscience condemns him for doing things that Scripture now allows. Though the Bible does not prohibit eating meat sacrificed to idols, their conscience isn’t yet trained by that truth. And thirdly, this passage shows that the weaker one has a weak will. They may be easily swayed to act against his conscience by the behavior of others. they see someone else doing what he believes is wrong, and he goes along—despite his internal conviction. That means he is especially vulnerable. So, summing it up: They lacks knowledge. They has an overly sensitive conscience. They have a weak will. Yet he is still a brother—saved, but fragile in his understanding of the freedom we have in Christ. Now, let me draw an important distinction: the weaker one in Scripture is not the same as the legalistic person we often encounter today. The weaker brother described here is receptive—if anything, too receptive. He thinks something is wrong, and when he sees someone else do it, he imitates them even though it violates his conscience. That’s weakness. But the legalistic brother is the opposite. He believes something is wrong, and then goes on to insist it is wrong for everyone. He becomes rigid, immovable, judgmental, and self-righteous. He isn’t weak—he’s proud. The legalist doesn’t cave in; he criticizes. And those are two very different attitudes. We are not to look down on or pass judgment on fellow believers over doubtful things. The phrase “doubtful thing” refers to any amoral, non-ethical issue. In other words, these are matters that are not inherently right or wrong, they are grey areas. Some things in Scripture are absolutely wrong. Other things are clearly right. But some practices are situational and depend on conscience, maturity, and context. Paul’s instruction is this: If you are a believer and you think you have the liberty to do a certain thing, fine—go ahead. But don’t judge the brother who doesn’t. And if you’re a believer who doesn’t feel free to do that thing, don’t judge the others who do. If someone has truly trusted Jesus Christ—regardless of where they stand on these grey areas—we as fellow Christians are called to receive them. Now let’s take this a step further. Let’s say those folks—the ones who have different convictions about food or special days—are members of your own church. They show up regularly for worship, they serve, they give, they love Christ. What would be your response? I think I know what many Christians would say, or at least how they would act. They might not say it out loud, but they’d think, “These people are a bit behind the times. They’re out of touch. They don’t really fit in here.” Isn’t that how we so often operate? But Paul says—don’t do that. Don’t look down on them. Don’t judge them. If Scripture doesn’t directly prohibit or prescribe something, if it’s an area of Christian liberty, then don’t treat them as outsiders. Receive them as brothers and sisters. As fellow believers. And why should we respond that way? Beginning in verse 4 of Romans 14 and continuing to the end of the chapter, Paul explains why. And he does it by asking two questions. The first is in verse 4: “Who are you to judge another man’s servant?” That’s a powerful question. He’s saying, you have no right to sit in judgment. That believer you’re looking at, perhaps criticizing in your heart—they don’t ultimately answer to you. They answer to the Lord. In the first-century context, a slave was fully and exclusively accountable to their own master. No one else had any right to interfere. So, Paul’s making a clear point: every Christian is a servant of the Lord, and the Lord alone has the right to assess their choices in these non-essential matters. Paul then says, “To his own master he stands or falls.” But he doesn’t leave it there—he adds this: “Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.” That’s remarkable. Paul takes an optimistic view. He trusts that God will sustain His own. Then in verse 5, Paul starts unpacking what all of this looks like in practical terms. He writes: One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. Some people treat certain days as sacred—perhaps for fasting or time of worship and reflection. Others treat every day the same. Paul doesn’t say one is right and the other is wrong. What does he say? “Let each be fully convinced in his own mind.” This is about personal conviction. And as long as it’s done unto the Lord, it’s acceptable. Paul continues in verse 6: Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. Do you hear the refrain there? To the Lord… to the Lord… gives God thanks. That’s the whole point. Paul is saying, it’s not the act itself—it’s the heart behind it. If someone refrains from eating meat because they believe it honours God, then fine. If someone enjoys the meat and gives thanks to God for it, also fine. The real issue is not the diet or the day—it’s the devotion and the attitude that motivates those decisions. Paul sums this up in verses 7 through 9. Listen out foe the repeated use of that little word “for”: For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living. This is the theological heart of the argument. Every Christian belongs to Jesus—completely. In life, in death, in everything—we are His. He lived and died and rose again to be Lord of all. Paul is reminding us that the Lordship of Christ is total. So, if someone lives out their faith in a way that looks different from yours—again, in matters where Scripture gives liberty—they are still doing it as His servant, not yours. Then Paul asks his second big question in verse 10: You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister? Or why do you treat them with contempt? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat. So here’s the progression: in verses 4–9, Paul says we don’t judge because every believer is a servant of the Lord. Now in verses 10–13, he gives us another reason—we don’t judge because we will all have to give an account to Christ. Paul quotes Isaiah 45:23 to make this point: “As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to Me, and every tongue shall confess to God.” God is the judge—not you, not me. So Paul concludes in verse 12: “So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.” That’s sobering. You won’t answer for your brother. You won’t answer for your sister. You’ll only answer for yourself. So, the message is clear. Stop worrying about what others are doing in areas of Christian freedom. Start paying attention to your own heart. Are you living for the Lord? Are you giving thanks? Are you walking in love and humility? Because when we stand before Christ, that is what will matter. Let’s pause for a moment and bring some clarity to a potentially confusing point. If you have your Bible, I invite you to keep a finger in Romans 14 and turn over to John 5. In verse 24, Jesus says this: “Most assuredly, I say to you, he who hears My word and believes in Him who sent Me has everlasting life, and shall not come into judgment, but has passed from death into life.” That is a staggering promise. Jesus is crystal clear—if you have heard His Word and believed in the One who sent Him, you already possess eternal life. You have crossed over from death to life. And He adds, you shall not come into judgment. Now, drop back into Romans 14, and Paul says that we will all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. So, which is it? Will Christians be judged or not? This isn’t a contradiction—it’s a clarification. The New Testament teaches both of these truths side by side. If you have trusted in Jesus Christ, your eternal destiny is secure. The issue of heaven or hell has been decisively settled at the cross. In that sense, you will never face condemnation. As Paul has already said in Romans 8:1: “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.” But that does not mean believers are free from all forms of accountability. The Bible also teaches that every Christian will give an account—not to determine salvation, but to evaluate their lives in light of their discipleship. Paul unpacks this in 2 Corinthians 5:10: “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.” So, make no mistake—if you are in Christ, you will never be judged in terms of condemnation. But you will give an account to your Lord. Not for punishment, but for evaluation. Not to determine whether you are His, but to answer how you’ve lived as once you became His. And that is the very point Paul is making in Romans 14. Why should we not pass judgment on fellow believers in areas of Christian freedoms? Because each believer is accountable—not to you, not to me—but to Christ. Paul’s conclusion comes sharply in verse 13: “Therefore, let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, resolve not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.” Now here’s something fascinating. The word translated “resolve” in that verse is actually the same Greek word as “judge.” It’s a play on words. Paul is saying, in effect: Stop judging each other about disputable matters. But if you really want to exercise judgment—then judge this instead: Judge to make sure that you will not do anything that causes your brother or sister to stumble. That’s the pivot. Paul shifts our focus from personal critique of other people to acceptance of personal responsibility only. He’s saying, “Stop pointing fingers and start examining your own influence.” Are you helping others grow in grace? Or are you throwing obstacles in their path? This idea will be developed even further in the next section of the chapter, tomorrow, but the message so far is already deeply practical: Receive one another in love. Stop passing judgment in matters where Scripture allows some freedomy. Why? Because each of us belongs to the Lord. And each of us will give our own account to Him. So let me close with three big truths that arise from this passage—truths that are both sobering and liberating: 1. There are “doubtful things.” Not everything in the Christian life is black and white. Some issues are grey—disputable matters over which sincere believers may disagree. The Bible recognizes these. And it urges us not to elevate our personal scruples into universal mandates. We must resist the urge to turn grey areas into new laws. 2. Believers will be judged—but not for condemnation. Every believer will stand before Christ—not to determine salvation, but to give an account. That’s a sober reality. It means our lives matter. Our choices matter. Our attitudes, words, and actions will be evaluated in light of our devotion to Christ. We are stewards of the grace we’ve received. That should lead us not to fear, but to reverence. 3. God alone is Judge. And so, we must leave the judging to Him. Our job is not to evaluate the sincerity of someone else’s conscience. Our calling is to love, and to and to avoid putting stumbling blocks in each other’s way. It’s God’s role to judge the heart. It’s our role to walk humbly, live gratefully, and serve each other in love. So, as you go through your week, ask yourself: Am I living for the Lord? Am I giving thanks in all things? Am I being careful not to trip up those around me? Because one day, each of us will stand before the Lord who died for us, who rose again, and who reigns now as our righteous Judge and gracious Redeemer. Frankly, this truth ought to sober us: “We must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due for the things done while in the body, whether good or evil” (2 Cor. 5:10). That includes believers. That includes you and me. This reality makes me nervous—and it should. Jesus Himself said we will give an account even for every idle word (Matt. 12:36). We take that far too lightly. So, while it's comforting to know that our salvation is secure—that in Christ we have passed from death to life and shall not come into condemnation (John 5:24)—it is equally sobering to remember that we will still be held accountable by our Lord. Not for condemnation, but for how we lived as His servants. John puts it poignantly: “Abide in Him, so that when He appears we may have confidence and not shrink from Him in shame at His coming” (1 John 2:28). Here, then, is the great irony: while every believer will stand before God's judgment seat, we spend far too much time judging each other now. And that is precisely what Romans 14:13 forbids: "Therefore let us not judge one another any more, but rather determine this—not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way." Now, to be clear, the Bible does at times call us to make righteous judgments (John 7:24). There are moral absolutes. Romans 13 lists several: “You shall not commit adultery, you shall not murder, you shall not steal…” (Rom. 13:9). These are black-and-white issues. When Scripture speaks clearly, we may, and indeed must, hold each other accountable to those. But Romans 14 addresses another category entirely—what Paul calls “disputable matters.” Gray areas. Non-essentials. Areas where Scripture gives freedom, and the Spirit gives wisdom. In these areas, judgment is not our job. Let’s be honest: judging others comes easily, especially in these grey zones. The early church was divided over days and diets. Today, the list is just as long: • Spending habits • Parenting decisions • Styles of worship • Whether to have a Christmas tree • Whether to drink alcohol • Whether to homeschool, public school, or private school your kids Let’s be honest about this: the unspoken pastime of many Christians is attempting to change one another. We look sideways at how someone dresses, how they spend their money, how they raise their children—and we pronounce our sometimes, not so silent verdict. But here’s the thing: we are not God. When we judge others in areas where God has granted liberty, we usurp His place. That’s not love. That’s spiritual pride. And Romans 14 could not be clearer: Cease and desist. Imagine the sheer arrogance of stepping into the judgment seat of God to weigh another Christian’s conscience in a matter where Scripture is silent. That seat is already occupied. And it’s not by you. We will each stand before another seat of judgement seat, the judgment seat of Christ. Each one of us. The strong and the weak. The traditional and the progressive. The reformed and the charismatic. All of us, individually, will give an account to the Lord—not for our neighbour’s life, but for our own. So what should we do instead of judging? Paul gives us a better use for our judgment: “Determine this—not to put a stumbling block or obstacle in your brother’s way.” In other words, use your discernment to love, not to lord. Build-up, don’t trip up. In the grey areas, lean into grace. Therefore, stop judging each other in disputable matters. That's God’s job, not yours. And may the Church of Jesus Christ be known not for internal scrutiny and side-eye suspicion, but for grace-filled love and humility. For “he who loves another has fulfilled the law” (Rom. 13:8).